I KNOW I'VE SAID IT BEFORE - BUT WHEN WILL THEY EVER LEARN?

Two senior politicians, one the ex-Secretary of Defence and the other a Cabinet Office Minister, both leading "big brains" in the Government, have been caught out doing daft things this week. 

The first, Dr Liam Fox, allowed his friend Adam Werritty access to secure areas at the Ministry of Defence without clearance and invited him on many sensitive missions abroad.  Dr Fox has now resigned but this one is still running with, no doubt, more horrors to be unveiled in the coming days.

The second is even more unbelievable.  Oliver Letwin a senior policy adviser to the Government was seen throwing documents and letters into public litter bins in St James's Park.  What on earth possessed him.  And apparently he has been doing this for some time. There are claims that some of the documents were sensitive.  He says not.  He simply walks in the park at the back of Downing Street whilst dictating replies to letters which he then throws in the bin.  Doesn't he have a filing system like us mere mortals? Crazy or what?

Neither act appears (yet!) to be illegal but the point is it's not what they have done that is so wrong, but the fact that they actually thought they could do it and get away with it that stuns me.  These supposedly  intelligent humans beings are currently entrusted with running our Country for goodness sake. They know that they are under intense public scrutiny so why do it?  You can only assume that they are arrogant enough to feel "untouchable".  It makes you want to scream doesn't it?

Now back to my 'umble existence.  I have a young Swiss boy staying with me at the moment.  When I say this I am told that I should say he is an exchange student, and that saying that I have a young Swiss boy staying sounds wrong on every level!  I'm actually flattered that anyone should think there could be any form of impropriety between a 71 year old bat and a 15 year old boy.  The story is that a friend asked me give him shelter and food for 10 days so that he can mix with English folk to improve his language skills.

Unfortunately, he is painfully shy and although I have been trying to get him involved in the "outside world" I live in a very rural location and don't know many teenagers.  Consequently he isn't getting to meet anyone of interest and most of the coloqual English he's learning is of the anglo-saxon kind. This is going to be the longest 10 days of his life poor soul.

I may take him to the cinema again today (we went to see Johnny English on Thursday), tomorrow we go bowling, on Monday we take him to London and on Tuesday he is going to a Peterborough United football match.   Really living the high life!

Obituary to Common Sense

This was sent to me this morning by a friend.  It purports to be an Obituary printed in the London Times.  I have know way of knowing if this is true or not, but I wholeheartedly agree with the sentiment.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red
tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- Why the early bird gets the worm;
- Life isn't always fair;
- and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;

I Know My Rights
I Want It Now
Someone Else Is To Blame
I'm A Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

AM I NOW "OFFICIALLY" A GRUMPY OLD WOMAN ?

Yesterday I went to London to meet up with my good friend Monica who had been my neighbour for 10 years in Switzerland and to pick up a Swiss boy (but that's another story). 

Before I start I should say that I love train travel.  I love the fact that I don't have to "check in" two hours ahead of departure and I love the soothing rythum of the train.  So with my advance ticket booking confirmation in hand I attemped to retrieve my "real" tickets from the ticket machine. 

Unbelievably, the keyboard was both sensitive and insensitive at the same time.  Sensitive as in when I  keyed in my booking reference number it picked up the letter underneath, the letter adjacent and sometimes both.  However the "back" button didn't work which meant that I couldn't backtrack,  Each time I had to start from scratch again, and again, and again! "OK" I instruct myself, "calm down and move to another machine."  Same thing. 

Next calming step is to go into the ticket hall and negotiate with a "human being" to, out the kindness of their heart, help me with the process.  There was a queue and only two desks open.  At one desk a lengthy transaction was taking place and at the other the clerk was wrestling with a piece of electonics which appeared not to be working.  I then spot another bank of ticket machines and decided to give it one more go.  Hey Presto!  It worked. 

The departure board indicated that trains to London were running late and as I had a tight schedule I wondered if I could get on the next late train instead of the one I had booked onto which was going to be even later (if you get my drift).  I thought the best plan was to ask.  Ah!! The "information" desk was unmanned, there were no platform staff anywhere to be seen and by now the ticket hall was even busier with the clerk still punching buttons on the electronic device which patently was never, ever going to work again. 

Then they announced that the 1st late train was due to arrive.  A despatcher magically appeared from his cubby hole, clipboard in hand.  Leaping on him I asked if I could use my ticket on this train.  "No, sorry love, this ticket is "time specific".  If you get on this train you will be charged full single price again".  So I had to let that train go and I had to let the next one go too. And for the priviledge of all this I had paid the princely sum of £55.80 - discounted, I should add, because I had booked early.

After our brief meeting, my dear friend Monica (who, I'm sure won't mind me saying, is older than me and that's quite old) was to travel on to Lancaster.  When we went to buy her ticket  she got £20 out of her purse, I said "that won't be enough" and, sure enough, she had to pay £79 for a one way ticket.  Outragous.  I asked the clerk if she could book a seat "no, you can only do that 3 hours ahead of time". 

Why do we make such a big, and I should add expensive, deal of simple things?  This bloody country, sometimes I hate it.






 

Ten Thoughts to Ponder

 10 Life is sexually transmitted.

 9  Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

 8  Men have two emotions : Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make  him a sandwich

 7  Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.

 6  Some people are like a Slinky-not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

 5   Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospitals, dying of nothing.

 4  All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

 3  Why does a slight tax increase cost you $800.00, and a substantial tax cut saves you $30.00?

 2  In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. (Amen to that one!)

...........and the number 1 thought    -     Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers - what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.

- - - and as someone recently said to me:  " Don 't worry about old age--it doesn't last that long."

And on to more serious stuff.  Next Tuesday, 11th October, I am being interviewed for a 2 page spread with pictures in a woman magazine.  My 15 minutes of fame (again!!).  Wish me luck that I don't make an ass of myself.

NOT OF THIS WORLD

I like this.  It's from the London City website Squaremile.com and amid the continuing tumult of the world money markets is very pertinent.

Einstein dies and goes to heaven ony to be informed that his room isn't ready.
 
St. Peter tells him "I hope you won't mind waiting in a dormitory, even though you'll have to share the room with others." 

Einstein assures him there's no problem and St. Peter leads him in, saying "Here is your first room-mate.  He has an IQ of 180" "That's wonderful" says Einstein "We can discuss particle physics."

St Peter then says: "And here's your second room-mate, his IQ is 150!" "Great," replies Einstein "We can talk about cosmology."

Just then another man reaches out to grab Einstein's hand and shakes it. "I'm your final room-mate," he explains, "and I'm sorry but my IQ is only 80." Einstein smiles back and replies: "So, where do you think the markets are headed?"

Back to more "worldly" things.  The "Idiot Abroad" programme on Sky1 at 9.00 pm this evening is about the Trans-Siberian Express.  I shall be watching with interest................ !! 

SOME OF MY FELLOW TRAVELLERS IN THE
"RESTAURANT CAR" ON THE TRANS-SIBERIAN EXPRESS

MY "ROOM MATES" IN THE TINY 4-BERTH CABIN
THAT WAS OUR HOME FOR 4 DAYS (& NIGHTS!!!)

WAITING TO BOARD



PRE-BOARDING EXCITEMENT!

And while on the subject of "my trip", this morning I had an email from a journalist who is interesting in writing an article about the journey. Watch this space.

WHERE DOES TIME GO?

As I said, where does time go?  My dear friend Sue moved to Spain with her beloved husband Paul 11 years ago, much about the same time that Davy and I bought our lovely Alpine retreat.  Consequently whenever Davy and I went away it was either to Switzerland or up to Scotland to see his family.  I always promised to visit Sue and Paul but shamefully never did. 

It was through Sue that I met Davy.  I like to tell folks that he lived with her, which is absolutely truebut I sometimes omit to add that in his days as a jobbing bricklayer he lodged with her for a while!   

However............this year I promised that I would go when the weather cooled down.  Believe it or not  they had temperatures peaking at 60C this summer.  Admittedly that was in direct sunlight but that's way, way too hot for me. When I tell friends this they look at me in disbelief.  Surely not.  But Sue & Paul showed me their digital thermometer display and lo and behold there it was, highest temperature 60C. 

So earlier this month I trotted off to see them, carefully avoiding easyJet!  

It's a pretty idyllic place in the mountains above the Costa Del Sol.  I had 6 days of perfect bliss with them, enjoying the scenery, solitude and freindship.  I loved it so much that I am thinking of buying a bolthole down by the beach for us all to escape to from time to time.   

SUE AND I ENJOYING OUR MORNING "EYE OPENER"

But that's for the future and I desperately try to live in the "now".  Not, I would add, always very successfully! The "now" plan is to look into the possibilty of building a house on my plot of land following the demolition of the "black bungalow".   I have planning permission to build a four bedroom house but I had been thinking of taking the easy route which is to sell the plot and let someone else build the house. 

But you know, sometimes I get a tad bored and it would seem that I like to live on the edge a little!  Davy was a builder and I'm hoping that I picked up the building trade by osmosise. I also have really good friends in the trade who are willing to "baby sit" me. I think it could be fun.  Am I deluded in thinking that I can manage a project like this?  I couldn't start on the project for a few months anyway so I have a little "thinking time" but hey, I should be able to eat this elephant a bit at a time!



My other big news is that my beloved grandson Vinnie has now moved to Sydney with his fabulous girlfriend Hilary.  He is working as a chef in a swanky restaurant on Balmoral Beach called The Public Dining Room.   And... I hope to visit him in February together with my grandaughter Georgina and two of my Great Grandchildren, Elise and Orianne. 

I also hope to be able to pay a visit to my good friends Jack and Betsy in Desert Hot Springs this winter too, so it's all happening here.

THE POOL THAT PAUL BUILT



PAUL, FONDLY GAZING INTO MY EYES! NOT!!





AH! EASYJET AGAIN

Here is my latest correspondence to Carolyn McCall, easyJet's CEO. 

Re: EasyJet Query [Incident: 110726-001018] – Booking Reference EHPNQXZ

On 13th August I wrote regarding the above incident and you referred my correspondence on to Graeme MacLeod your Head of Customer Operations. I would imagine that he subsequently reported back to you that the incident was now closed to his satisfaction. Unfortunately, it was not closed to my satisfaction.

My blog had 2386 page views last month, 52 people work in my office, I have a large extended family and many friends all of whom are astounded at the lack of understand that easyJet has exhibited.

I simply wrote to alert you of problems and was advised to refer my “complaint” to Luton Airport when in fact you should have thanked me for pointing out that your fare paying passengers cannot physically clear security and walk to the gate in the 10 minutes slot between check in and gate closures.

You should either raise the “complaint” with the airport yourself to ensure that this can be achieved or change your criteria. What you should NOT have done was deny boarding to 18 fare paying passengers plus 2 infants, blame them for being late (although I refute that we were late) and then treat them with cold, callous, contempt which is what Amanda Nunan did.

I am a serial traveler. Immediately prior to my visit to Switzerland (the subject of our correspondence) I had returned from a four month overland and sea trip around the world through Europe, Russia, Siberia, Mongolia, China, across the Pacific to Alaska, Canada, USA, finally returning to England across the Atlantic and never had a problem with service .

This week I am travelling from East Midlands to Malaga with bmibaby who, incidentally, ask passengers to be at the gate 30 minutes before departure and add that the gate closes 15 minutes before departure.

By the way, isn’t today the day that the Office of Fair Trading instructed you and other airlines to reduce your exorbitant credit and debit card charges? Are you going to do this? I suspect not. Bear in mind that feelings of invincibility have long been the enemy of many businesses that then go on to fail, News Corporation for example. Are you feeling invincible?

Regards, Ann Cordner