Thursday 17 July 2008

THEY WALK AMOUNG US, MANY ARE IN RETAIL, THEY REPRODUCE AND WORSE – THEY VOTE!

“That will be £2.41” She stuck her hand out for the money
I handed over a £5 note and said “I’ll give you the odd 41p in change”
“That’s alright, we’ve got plenty of change”
"But I would rather I gave you the .41p"
"I've rung it up now"
"But I don't want more change"
"I't only £2.59 in change
“No, what I mean is I have a purse full of change that I want to get rid of ”
“Well I've rung it up now” she repeated as she shoved the change at me.

It must have been that woman’s lucky day. She doesn’t know how close I came to leaping over her wretched counter and throttling her. Instead I graciously took the change and smiled. Whatever!

This experience reminded me of something my dear lunch friend emailed me some time ago. These examples of this manic type of behaviour are Americans which proves that this problem is global:-

I was at the checkout of a K-Mart. The clerk rang up $46.64 charge. I gave her a fifty-dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I gave the money back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favour. She became indignant and informed me she was educated and knew what she was doing, and returned the money again. I gave her the money back. Same scenario! I departed the store with the $46.64.

They Walk Among Us

I walked into a Starbucks with a buy-one-get- one-free coupon for a GrandeLatte. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free." "They're already buy-one- get-one-free, "she said, "so I guess they're both free". She handed me my free Lattes and I walked out the door.

They Walk Among Us!

One day I was walking down the beach with some Friends when one of them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said,"Where?"

They Walk Among Us!

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the North?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh I don't keep up with all that stuff."

They Walk Among Us!!

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call centre was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific."

They Walk Among Us!

My sister has a life saving tool in her car designed to cut through a seatbelt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

They Walk Among Us!

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

They Walk Among Us!

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up.She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, has your plane arrived yet?"

They Walk Among Us!

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding."Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."

Yep, They Walk Among Us! They Walk Among Us,and they Reproduce,and Worst of all.....they Vote!

35 comments:

aims said...

OMG!!

I'm sitting here pulling at my hair!

It's an invasion.

Sandi McBride said...

I'm about to pee myself I'm laughing so hard...wish I knew where that Kmart was, I'd go shopping!
Sandi

Anonymous said...

'Has your plane arrived yet?'

ROFL!!! Priceless!!

Undercover Mother said...

This just happened to me the other night at Dairy Queen. My total was $2.59, so I gave the girl $5.09. Her head exploded all over my Blizzard.

Anonymous said...

Lordy,lordy, lordy....what a world we live in.

Can Bass 1 said...

Good Lord, why do I never get that kind of cashier?

Dumdad said...

Funny old world!

DogLover said...

Having a rotten today. Customers will keep giving me money for the things they've bought, wait until I've rung it up and then try to give me loose change.

They want to muck me around so that they don't have to carry a few more coins in their purse!

Some of them look as if they will murder me if I don't unravel everything and do it all again.

And my hemorroids are giving me hell, too.

Anonymous said...

Fantastic, esp about the seat belt cutter.

CJ xx

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Yeh! Scary isn't it aims.

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

I'd go there with you Sandi

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

It's hard to believe isn't it Jay?

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Hi Mom of three - being a citizen of the UK, I don't actually know what a Blizard is. I'm hoping that it's some kind if ice cream?

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Anonymous, is it any wonder that we are in the mess that we are in?

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Me too, Can Bass 1. The only cashiers I get are stroppy ones.

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Sure is, Dumdad. Is this why you went to France? Or is it the same there?

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Oh DogLover, you are so nieve. The woman was a cow!

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

I was left wondering if I have every done such a daft thing CJ, but after deliberation - nah!

karmacarrot said...

Kinda reminds me of Jeff Foxworthy's rant on stupid people.

'Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say, "I'm Stupid." That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You wouldn't ask them anything. It would be like, "Excuse me...oops...never mind, didn't see your sign.'

'A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big ol' stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope. Talked 'em into giving up. Here's your sign.'

'Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of those side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my truck, looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. I said, "Nope. I was driving around and those other three just swelled right up on me. Here's your sign.'

'We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. A guy came over to the house and drove the car around for about 45 minutes. We get back to the house, he gets out of the car, reaches down and grabs the exhaust pipe, then says, "Darn that's hot!" See, if he'd been wearing his sign, I could have stopped him.'


The next time someone says something stupid ask them where their sign is.

Maggie May said...

I don't ever get change in my favour! usually short change if anything. That woman sounded dotty!
Some strange tales there!

ADDY said...

Hilarious.

Carrie Wilson Link said...

LMAO!!!! "I don't keep up with that stuff," OMG!!!!

Thank you for the great chuckles!

Salute said...

What is this world coming to, such ashame.

Anonymous said...

Ha!! I am glad I never meet people like this.... oh.. I am one.

laurie said...

man, why can't i ever get those clerks?

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Welcome to you karmacarrot next time someone asks me where MY sign is I'll deck them!

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Maggie, I had actually have had the experience where I challenged being wrong changed in my favour and been left to feel as though I have done something wrong, I guess some people just can't accept that they do anything wrong.

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

I agree rosario, it is a really funny list of happenings isn't it?

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Carrie, I remember OG trying to explain to someone why the sun always rose in the east. He just did not get it! OG finally said "if it every rises anywhere else, run for the hills. It will be the end of the world". He still didn't get it!

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Mae, it sure is a weird and wonderful place that we live in.

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Laurie, don't wish that on yourself.

Strawberry Jam Anne said...

It's lovely to have a good laugh - but it does make you wonder.

One day in ELC I went to pay for an item which cost £2.20 and gave the cashier £5 note and 20p. She had to call for assistance!

I shop in K-Mart when I'm in Australia - always get a bargain but not as good as yours.

Loved your family wedding pics - so glad you all had a lovely time. A x

Grit said...

that is very funny!

but i may be one of them. a little while ago i got in the driving seat of a car that was unfamiliar to me and when i felt for the indicator switches i felt they were ridged under the fingertips, and i said 'hey! that's really good! the indicator switches are ridged! that must be really useful for the blind'.

i can't believe i said that. and that i've just confessed it in public.

Carole said...

Yikes!!!!!!!! Save us!!! I love your blog. This is my first visit. I have added you to my blog list. I'll be back again.
Carole

www.retiredandcrazy.com said...

Hi Grit, here's your sign. I was caught out once when OG and I were driving along a newly constructed major road with stange signs painted on the carriageway. OG told me that it was a trial for a "Big Brother" type satelite tracking device that would spy on all drivers. Here's my sign.