AQUA-FIT CLASSES - WHO ME?

Another New Year. I wondered if I should start a new diet while I still had chocolates in the house. Decision – start now. Then in walked my granddaughter with a box of chocolates from her partner as a thank you gift for looking after our two beautiful great-granddaughters on New Years Eve while they went out. It would be rude to start a diet now (wouldn’t it?).

So I then get an email from my potty friend

“and so here it is - 2008 - I'll be 56 by the end of it and when I found a real problem with 55 what the hell will 56 do to me???? So I decided that this year I'm going back into the Tardis and will grow younger by the minute (no comments please).

Therefore one of my thoughts is “get back to the swimming pool”. Do you fancy an aqua-fit class? I have to say the last time I went to the pool was when my Father (who has never been able to swim properly) decided he should do it to get fit again. He jumped in at the shallow end and nearly ruptured his spine. We managed two attendances and I managed two lengths!

During one of those two visits I looked at the ladies doing their aqua- fit classes - jumping up and down in waist high water and waving their arms in the air and if that is all it takes to get fit I think we could do that. Alternatively we could go to Glastonbury!!!! (now there's a thought)

As you do at a New Year I have looked at my life and decided “new year - new life” that'll last until tomorrow - but I have enrolled for an RHS course in garden design. I do not know the name of any plants - I do not know what to plant where - I have never tested the ph balance of my soil (no more do I care) - but I do have a compost bin!! I must be their best candidate yet!!!

And so to 2008, I have New York and France to look forward to - you have Davy getting better (please God) to look forward to - I have a new grand-child to arrive in January, and two beautiful grand-children already here - you have how many grand-children and great-grandchildren?? who make our lives so full and to give us the pleasure of their company

I started this e-mail to say Happy New Year and I end it saying Happy New Year because that is what I wish for you and yours and hopefully I'll see you in the pool!!!

Love you both xxxxxxxx”

So, diet and aqua-fit classes or Glastonbury? Now that's a hard decision for a 67 year old to have to make. Let me think - Glastonbury!

You will remember that this particular lady was visiting Dubai and I wondered how she would fare. The answer to that is that she fared quite well under the circumstances. But that is a story for another day …..

OUR FAMILY CHRISTMAS

After lunch we are setting off for a nice country house hotel about a 40 minutes drive away for our annual family Christmas get-together. It is also a belated birthday treat for my beloved who turned 65 in the autumn but didn’t feel up to it at the time.

This year may be the last time we can orchestrate this because the children are all growing up and moving away. Each year it becomes more and more difficult to get everyone synchronised. But this year it will be a “full house”.

Starting with the eldest, there is my daughter, her husband and three boys. Two boys are still at school and the eldest (26) is just about to start an obscenely overpaid job in the City of London as an economist. Yesterday they moved into a new house. This daughter lives life on the edge but the move is wild even for her. The central heating and electrics need attention and everyone tried to persuade her to delay moving until they were fixed.

Naturally she ignored wise advice and now they are in a house that has stood empty for several months, with no central heating, no cooker and dodgy electrics. They could normally have stayed with us, but we are in the middle of a renovation programme ourselves and only have one small spare bedroom. For me this is the stuff that nightmares are made of and I would do anything to be able to fix things for her, but I can’t.

Next is my younger daughter who recently resigned her directorship with our company and is moving to an exciting new life in France in the New Year together with her husband and the three youngest children.

Her three older children are staying here. One is a handsome chef with an eye for the ladies, another is a guitar playing, singing all around Mr Nice Guy who is reading mathematics at university and, last but not least, is their beautiful sister who works in our business and is the daughter of our two wonderful great granddaughters. Our granddaughters’ sporty partner will also be enjoying the festivities with us.

Then comes my dearly beloved’s lovely daughter. She and her family moved down from Scotland to help us with our retirement “exit strategy”. After being thrown in at the deep end she became a fellow director in our company and will, I am sure, take the company on to new heights. Her husband is a designer in London and the boys are in primary school.

Also joining us will be a talented young lady who has worked with us for 15 years and is now a fellow director and surrogate daughter. With her will be her tolerant and handsome husband and their young son.

So … there you have it - 25 of us and a very mixed bag aged from 4 to 67. We love being together but as a group have outgrown most of our houses and certainly all of my energy! So - hotel here we come, are you readyfor this?

Have a very happy and prosperous New Year.

RECYCLING MADNESS

I like to think that I am a GOOD CITIZEN. I recycle whenever possible, I take my own M&S bags when I shop at M&S, my own Sainsbury’s bags when I shop at Sainsbury’s, my own Tesco bags when I shop at Tesco etc. (I refuse to be seen with Morrison bags), I get black looks from shop assistants when I ask them not to put my one small purchase into a plastic bag, and I don’t make unnecessary car journeys preferring to multi-task my trips.

I admit that I do drive a powerful car, but my husband (thankfully) refuses to allow me to drive a car below my station! I know, this all sounds hypocritical bearing in mind the car I drive and my world travel log of the last few months, but I was fed up with being blamed by WORLD LEADERS for being the cause of global warming.

So what happens? “Hi, someone stole my recycling box, can I have another one please” “Can I have your postcode?” I comply. “Your area has been issued with green recycling bags” “I didn’t get any” “can I have your full name and address please”. Like a numpty I comply again. “thank you” “is that it? are you going to issue me with green recycling bags” “your area has already been issued with bags” “but I didn’t get any” “you can use cardboard boxes, carrier bags or white plastic bags for the recycling”. OK, I got the point, I realised that I had reached the point of diminishing returns and I’m too old to waste valuable living time arguing the toss with a bolshi telephonist.

So here we have it. The Council has decided, in it’s wisdom, and against my wishes to stop the sensible policy of issuing reusable boxes and now insists that everything is put into plastic bags (but not a black plastic bag because that is for waste only). I feel that this is a triumph for the shopkeepers who remember me haughtily refusing their wretched plastic bags. Now I am an avid plastic bag gather again.

And do you know the worst thing about this? One day my husband and I watched the bin men putting everything into the same waste vehicle. But, as I say, I don’t have enough life left to fight this sort of madness.

Recycling credibility will remain shot to pieces unless the really culprits are bought to justice. And who are the real culprits? Oil companies, toy manufacturers, bacon, cheese and other food producers that everyone hates because of the amount of hardcore packaging they make us struggle with to get to the goods, etc. Ah, but that would might interfere with marketing, profits and, god forbid, tax receipts. That is why this planet is in crisis. Greed and money, not poor Joe public. I say bollocks to the lot of them.

Do you know, before I got grumpy I was quite a nice person. Happy New Year.