Thursday 1 March 2007

DON'T RATTLE MY CAGE

THURSDAY 01/03/2007

I demanded “am I blogging to an empty world”? “Have patience” came the reply “write a few more blogs and then we will submit you to (an entirely incomprehensible name)” “Are you looking for comments then?” “Yes” “OK I’ll comment” said our ex-WWW ex-genius ex-employee.

Now, considering that I am joint MD (sometimes retired, sometimes not), a MAJOR shareholder and the brains behind this ‘ere international conglomerate (Infotel Solutions Ltd) I think that I am due a modicum of respect. Therefore when Ashley’s comments refer to the development of a foolproof system for management called the PHBM (pointy haired boss model) I feel, quite justifiably, miffed.

OK, so I did think that Stockholm was in Denmark, but any fool can make that mistake and it’s IT’s job to watch my back. That’s what I pay them for.

And talking of being miffed…. Today a group of my senior colleagues are on an “away day” to discuss strategic planning. That sounded very grown up and when I tried to blag my way into being included I was told I would be very welcome to “have lunch” with them. The word patronising sprang to mind but I refrained from wrecking the office, smiled sweetly and reminded myself not to get mad, but to get even. Be scared, be very, very scared.

Oh! Someone is in for a very bumpy ride today, and it ain’t gonna be me!

4 comments:

Ashley said...

Yesterday following our discussion about PHBM the team has implemented V0.1 of the PHBM! It will provide valuable assistance to our site users who, like me and you, do not have a 100% knowledge of geography. Thanks for the inspiration!

When can I pick up my p45? *cry*

Ashley said...

In my defence I was refering to this not this although that is much funnier!

Mark said...

As outlined in the specifications, the PHBM will send a message to a fleet of onhand barges and apache gunships to move Stockholm to Denmark in line with our customer care ethos. This is somewhat reminiscent of the red queen approuch in 'Alice through the looking glass'. When the red queen runs she doesn't move as the whole world moves backwards to keep up with her. :)

"Well, in our country," said Alice, still panting a little, "you'd generally get to somewhere else — if you run very fast for a long time, as we've been doing."

"A slow sort of country!" said the Queen. "Now, here, you see, it takes all the running you can do, to keep in the same place. If you want to get somewhere else, you must run at least twice as fast as that!"

Ashley said...

that's genius